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$2.53
41. Helicoptors, Drill Sergeants &
$6.27
42. Parenting is Heart Work
$5.89
43. Parenting Your Asperger Child:
$10.38
44. Raising Freethinkers: A Practical
$12.20
45. The Parenting Breakthrough: Real-Life
$7.00
46. Stop Negotiating With Your Teen:
$9.26
47. Parenting Gifted Kids: Tips for
$9.51
48. The Co-Parenting Survival Guide:
$8.23
49. Parenting Adopted Adolescents:
$8.88
50. Parenting Isn't for Cowards: The
$9.13
51. The Enneagram of Parenting: The
$8.58
52. Positive Discipline A-Z: 1001
$8.49
53. What The Bible Says About Parenting
 
$12.89
54. Self Parenting: The Complete Guide
$8.92
55. Effective Parenting in a Defective
$6.42
56. The Secret of Parenting: How to
$10.29
57. Christlike Parenting: Taking the
$8.15
58. Devotions for Sacred Parenting:
$3.78
59. Nighttime Parenting: How to Get
$7.11
60. Raising An Emotionally Intelligent

41. Helicoptors, Drill Sergeants & Consultants: Parenting Styles and the Messages They Send
by Jim Fay
Paperback: 112 Pages (1995-01-01)
list price: US$7.95 -- used & new: US$2.53
(price subject to change: see help)
Asin: 0944634036
Average Customer Review: 4.5 out of 5 stars
Canada | United Kingdom | Germany | France | Japan
Editorial Review

Product Description
I have two addictions- kids and psychology. It's pretty easy to figure out why I grew addicted to kids, but with psychology it's less obvious. I became addicted to psychology because I grew up learning how to use power, and I finally got tired of fighting with everybody. In place of power, I'm suggesting some practical and usable tools for parents and teachers that are adapted from formal psychological concepts. I offer them as suggestions. You may chew on all of them, and you don't have to swallow a single one of them whole. I'm not trying to make you feel guilty. I'm not trying to tell you what you're doing wrong with your children. I simply want to share some psychological techniques that raised the quality of my life dramatically. I also want to do this because, for me, sharing these ideas is fun! ... Read more

Customer Reviews (18)

4-0 out of 5 stars Quick read
This book is quite a bit shorter than I expected.I read the whole thing in 30 minutes.It has good tips and advice in it.This would be a great coffee table book or one to keep in the bathroom.

5-0 out of 5 stars Terrific!
This book is such a quick read and can really jump-start your Love & Logic parenting life.If you are someone who is in need of a big-time parenting fix, hopefully this book can help you identify whether you're a helicopter parent, a drill sergeant, or a combination of the two.Several friends have already borrowed this, which has piqued their interests in the rest of the Love & Logic series.It's no substitute for Parenting with Love & Logic, but it's a great start!Also, if you're a teacher dealing with struggling families, this could be a great tool to pass on (just remember to get it back)!!!

5-0 out of 5 stars Do you need a gift for a baby?
I am a hugh fan of Love and Logic products.The only regret I have is that this advice was not available to me when I was raising my children.Now, I give this as a gift to new parents.It is a big hit at baby showers and raises many questions and lively conversations.

5-0 out of 5 stars This "primer" should be read by all new parents
This is a quick, easy read that introduces you to the Love & Logic system to raising kids. It will give you some basic insights andhelp you decide if you want to jump in and read some of the more comprehensive titles in this series. I only wish someone had told me about these when my kids were young.

5-0 out of 5 stars Fun Fast Informational
Recommended by my pediatrician, this was a very fast read and really made it simple to look at the diferent parenting styles and help me determine just what I wanted to be for my son.And it's inexpensive.Order it. ... Read more


42. Parenting is Heart Work
by Dr. Scott Turansky, Joanne Miller
Paperback: 256 Pages (2005-10-27)
list price: US$14.99 -- used & new: US$6.27
(price subject to change: see help)
Asin: 0781441528
Average Customer Review: 4.0 out of 5 stars
Canada | United Kingdom | Germany | France | Japan
Editorial Review

Product Description
If you're like most parents, you have developed your own parenting strategy—sometimes it seems to work, and other times—based on the way your child behaves—you wonder if it's working at all. There are countless ways to try to get a child's attention and to effect change—but here's the truth—unless you deal with a child through his or her heart, you are not likely to see lasting change.In this breakthrough book, Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, RN, BSN, reveal how you can learn to truly reach your child's heart to teach, train, and build a tremendous relationship.Parenting is Heart Work gives you the practical tools an easy-to-follow steps that will revolutionize how you:· Turn Correction times into learning experiences. · Equip your children to accept responsibility for their mistakes and meditate on the right things. · Influence and adjust the values and beliefs your children hold. · Maintain relationship with your children through love and emotional connectedness. ... Read more

Customer Reviews (7)

5-0 out of 5 stars Practical ideas
This book is an easy read with practical ideas that can be used by any parent.It is biblical based which I like.It includes verses throughout that pertain to the information and ideas presented.This book does a good job of relating biblical stories to real life situations that arise between parents and children every day.I would recommend this book to any parent needing guidance and direction in connecting on a deeper level with your children.

1-0 out of 5 stars Not what I expected
I bought this book based on the reviews of others. I should have done my own research. I do believe in a higher power but this "God" based book, quoting the bible and even going as far as to tell you what to pray is just too much. I tried to read over what I found to be ramming religion, the bible and God down my throat but it was everywhere. I guess if your a hardcore christian and deeply set in your beliefs this might work for you. For me..... its headed back to Amazon.com, along with Good & Angry from the same author. Just a heads up for those of other belief systems.

5-0 out of 5 stars Every parent needs to read this book!
I don't know how many books I've read on parenting, but this one goes to the top of the list.It is very practical and easy to read.My husband is using this to counsel parents now.AWESOME!

4-0 out of 5 stars A Must Have for All New Parents
This book should be passed out to all new parents in the hospital.It will set them on a path to true biblical parenting.Even if you are not "religious" it is a fabulous resource for parents to learn how to mold and shape the lives they have been entrusted with.

5-0 out of 5 stars Best parenting book!
I loved this book.Extremely practical, easy and ejoyable to read yet covered a lot of information. I'm going to start using this for baby gifts!It's the best parenting book I've read! ... Read more


43. Parenting Your Asperger Child: Individualized Solutions for Teaching Your Child Practical Skills
by Alan Sohn, Cathy Grayson
Paperback: 288 Pages (2005-02-01)
list price: US$15.95 -- used & new: US$5.89
(price subject to change: see help)
Asin: 0399530703
Average Customer Review: 4.0 out of 5 stars
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Editorial Review

Product Description
Asperger's Syndrome is a form of autism--but with the right guidance, these children can go on to live happy, fulfilling lives.

In Parenting Your Asperger Child, Dr. Alan Sohn's and Cathy Grayson's groundbreaking Cognitive Social Integration Therapy (CSIT) offers practical solutions that help parents prepare their children for a fulfilling life of social interaction outside the confines of their syndrome, addressing such topics as:

- The six characteristics of Asperger's Syndrome
- How to identify a child's type of Asperger's--and the best approaches for dealing with it
- Understanding how an Asperger's child sees and interprets the world
- Replacing inappropriate coping techniques with productive skills
- How to survive and learn from a crisis
- How school programs can aid in teaching Asperger children- Making changes that last ... Read more

Customer Reviews (24)

5-0 out of 5 stars Fabulous Resource!!
I would highly recommend this book to anyone who is parenting or in contact with an Asperger Child.It gives much insight and some great techniques for stressed out, tired, lost parents who just want to help in any way that they can.5 Stars!!

4-0 out of 5 stars Great resource...
I've searched high and low for books relating to parenting Asperger children and this is probably the best I've come across.Very informative, not a SUPER easy read, but considering the subject I didn't expect it to be.Probably the easiest read of all the books I've purchased - you can pretty much just open the book to random pages and start reading bits at a time.

1-0 out of 5 stars Advocates promoting conformity at the expense of developing a sense of self
I don't recommend it, in spite of the fact that it provides a useful service by dividing Asperger's Syndrome into a handful of subtypes, and uses the subtypes to provide insight into the behavior of children with Aspergers and effective ways to motivate them.
While it would seem to be a good idea in theory to modify childrens' undesirable behaviors through "natural consequences " e.g., you can keep throwing the tantrum and miss your scheduled checkers game, or you can get with the program and get to go have the checkers game", and sometimes this can be to good effect; some of the theraputic examples in this book seem to be entirely too rigid in the demanding of compliance at the cost of regard for "special needs", such as the sensory issues that many of these children have (while in the same breath, the assumption is that children with Asperger's have "special needs" at home and at school that justify a raft of bureaucratized interventions, including but not limited to therapists like the kind who wrote this book!), or for that matter developing a "sense of self". The latter can be difficult to do if one is affected by alexithymia, a difficulty in recognizing and processing emotions in oneself and others (listed as one of the symptoms of Asperger's in many other descriptions of Asperger's Syndrome, but strangely not in the list of Asperger's Syndrome symptoms in the back of the book!)
A concrete example of this in the book is of a little girl who was given the choice of attending chorus or staying back in the classroom and reading. The therapist convinced her that although she preferred to stay back and read, attending chorus wouldn't be the end of the world. Being a basically cooperative child, she continued attending chorus even though she ended up telling the therapist she still didn't learn to like it any better.
Why this effort to force compliance in an _elective_ activity instead of drawing a distinction between activities held to be _elective_ and those considered _mandatory_? Or having the therapist or parent give the girl a socially-acceptable method of opting out: she could say "no, thank you, chorus practice is too loud for me". Or perhaps giving her an alternate rationale for attending chorus practice, such as "all your friends go" or "your favorite teacher is leading it" if the following situations are the case.
The only explanation I can give is that this therapist and many parents who will undoubtably take his case studies as an example to follow are on an unsavory power trip.

5-0 out of 5 stars Only book you need
Don't waste your time with 50 books like most parents who are introduced to a diagnosis of aspergers for their child. This covers day to day operations as well as who to understand the background of this diagnosis. Easy to read and sift through. Revisit this book often. The only other book that should go into your library is the explosive child and 123 magic. Perhaps visit developmental books ny Ig as well to compare developmental stages by age.

5-0 out of 5 stars Amazon is #1 in my BOOK
Ordering from Amazon has made shopping online so much fun. And their tech support team are really nice people to assist you if you have any problems trying to place an order online. I would incourage everyone to try AMAZON you will be pleased. ... Read more


44. Raising Freethinkers: A Practical Guide for Parenting Beyond Belief
by Dale McGowan, Molleen Matsumura, Amanda Metskas, Jan Devor
Paperback: 288 Pages (2009-02-11)
list price: US$17.95 -- used & new: US$10.38
(price subject to change: see help)
Asin: 0814410960
Average Customer Review: 5.0 out of 5 stars
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Editorial Review

Product Description
" Praised by Newsweek as “a compelling read” andLibrary Journal as “accessible and down-to-earth,” Dale McGowan’sParenting Beyond Belief offered freethinking parents everywhere a compassionate introduction to raising caring, ethical children without religious guidance. Now, for the more than 40 million people in the United States who identify themselves as nonreligious, Raising Freethinkers offers solutions to the unique challenges secular parents face and provides specific answers to common questions, as well as over 100 activities for both parents and their children. This book covers every important topic nonreligious parents need to know to help their children with their own moral and intellectual development, including advice on religious-extended-family issues, death and life, secular celebrations, wondering and questioning, and more.Complete with reviews of books, DVDs, curricula, educational toys, and online resources relevant to each chapter topic, Raising Freethinkers helps parents raise their children with confidence. " ... Read more

Customer Reviews (18)

5-0 out of 5 stars Great Book for Family Discussion
We purchased Parenting Beyond Belief and loved the book. We are indeed raising freethinkers. The book "Raising Freethinkers"is exactly what it claims to be - a"Practical Guide for Parenting Beyond Belief".The chapters are well written and the exercises and references are very thorough and thought provoking.We highly recommend this book to anyone looking to have great discussions with their children regarding life, death, and our purpose on this Earth.

5-0 out of 5 stars This book is my "Bible"
This is by far the best book out there as a resource for non-religious parenting. It is full of practical advice, activities, resources (books, websites, etc). I've read it several times and made my husband read it. I go to it every time I need some reinforcement. This coupled with Parenting Beyond Belief give you pretty much everything you need.Definitely a must-own for non-religious parents.

5-0 out of 5 stars A valuabe tool for rational parents.
As humanity struggles to leave the ages of superstition and myth, Raising Free Thinkers is a shining light for the torch bearers. "JUSTIFIABLE HOMICIDE?"-Growing Up A Baptist Fundamentalist-

5-0 out of 5 stars Can't read it slowly enough
What an amazing resource! I have highlighted and dogeared this book to shreds...and I'm only halfway through it. Between the anecdotes and the referrals this book is worth its weight in gold. I can hardly wait to go back through it with a fine toothed comb. Thank you for writing this book. It's been needed for a long time.

5-0 out of 5 stars For parents of all ages, and those not yet parents
Knowing one of the co authors, Molleen Matsumura(Voices for Evolution), I highly recommend this book. Its not so much a book for or about parents wanting to raise a secular or non-religious child, but its a book for parents who want to raise smart, thinking children. Teaching a child how to think and not what to think. So if you are a parent, plan on being a parent, know someone who is about to become a parent, or you have a parent, get the book. ... Read more


45. The Parenting Breakthrough: Real-Life Plan to Teach Kids to Work, Save Money, and Be Truly Independent
by Merrilee Browne Boyack
Paperback: 256 Pages (2005-08-01)
list price: US$16.95 -- used & new: US$12.20
(price subject to change: see help)
Asin: 1590384415
Average Customer Review: 5.0 out of 5 stars
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Customer Reviews (41)

5-0 out of 5 stars Great Book!!
This book was a great book to stumble across.Very helpful in raising independent children.Love it!!

5-0 out of 5 stars A vision of possibilities
I think it's overwhelming to think of our responsibilities as a parent.The ideas in this book along with anything we do that causes us to change is going to "stretch" us.This book does just that, stretches our parenting muscles.I love this book because it gave me a vision of the possibilities.Thank you!!

5-0 out of 5 stars The world would be a better place...
The world would be a better place if all parents used the advice presented in this book.I appreciated the author's humor and ideas.I have implemented "the plan", her allowance system, and several of her suggestions for motivating children.I am glad I read this while my kids are young, because I hope to use many more of the ideas in the future.

5-0 out of 5 stars Totally motivating
My kids hate this book, but I love it. Yay to more able-bodied children!Honestly, my kids are not experiencing the you-need-to-contribrute-to-family philosophy for the first time now.We are just a little more intense and I am a lot more aware of my role in teaching them how to do things.It has been good.Always good to get more ideas.

4-0 out of 5 stars the parenting breakthrough
This is a great book.I love the realistic point of view from the author.She provided many different ideas which can accommodate for all the different families out there.I recommmend this book. ... Read more


46. Stop Negotiating With Your Teen: Strategies for Parenting Your Angry, Manipulative, Moody, or Depressed Adolescent
by Janet Sasson Edgette
Paperback: 192 Pages (2002-08-06)
list price: US$14.95 -- used & new: US$7.00
(price subject to change: see help)
Asin: 0399527893
Average Customer Review: 4.0 out of 5 stars
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Editorial Review

Product Description
A psychologist offers peace-making strategies for parents who don't know where to turn.

The sullen, withdrawn, sarcastic teenager. The defensive, wary, and helpless parent. This book builds a bridge between the two sides--with practical and supportive advice on how to:

* Contain conflicts before they escalate into violence
* Break through the teen's verbal intimidation
* Avoid futile arguments
* Turn confrontation into communication
* Stand firm against teen rage
* Manage teen manipulation
* Build the teen's self-esteem
* Talk to teens when no one knows what to say

For ever parent who's screamed, what am I going to do with you?, this book finally provides the answer. ... Read more

Customer Reviews (24)

3-0 out of 5 stars A little disappointed
My hopes were very high for receiving this book based on the title, however it did not live up to my expectations. This book says it gives strategies but in actuality I did not find it to give real concrete ideas and plans for dealing with specific problems. The real life scenerious were helpful if you were also dealing with that specific scenerio in your own teens life.I have read a couple books on teens and this was the least helpful.

5-0 out of 5 stars It's really not all that difficult - teenagers just make you think it is!
This book is common-sense.It's only 173 pages, not a difficult read, and a very helpful reminder of what some of us have forgotten in the "sturm und drang" (storm and stress) of raising a teenager in the 21st century.Parents face many distractions, and our teens know that.Some of them learn to manipulate us quite well.I happen to have one of those, and over the last several years, he has escalated his control of the whole family through his difficult temperament.I used to be able to manage him, give him guidance, structure, etc.But somewhere along the way, I lost sight of some important principles.This book is giving me a big wake-up call, and I hope it will also help my husband, who has been quite passive while our son has been holding the family hostage.

I see that quite a few reviewers are saying the book does not give step-by-step instructions.But through examples, the author is showing parents the approach to take.Another author who uses this same technique of allowing the child to feel the pain of his or her decisions is John Rosemond.I have read many of his books and used the principles to have a happier home life with my children.

If you feel that life has gotten the best of you - if your family has gone through difficult and stressful times and you've given your teenager more sympathy than you should have - if you've lost your way while your child has morphed into a disrespectful, difficult, uncooperative and basically awful teenager, use this book to get back some sanity and allow that teenager to grow up through reality.The parents have to be willing to let the consequences of the teen's decisions catch up to him/her.Neither parent can try to cushion the teen from bad decisions, or try to actually change the teen's moods.We are all entitled to FEEL any way we feel, just not ACT in ways that aren't healthy and that won't help us get along with others in the world.

I recommend this book for parents who need to know that it may not be as hard as we fear to get our kids back from the brink of REALLY bad choices.

5-0 out of 5 stars great service
I received this product in just a few days. The product was advertised as "good" but it was actually almost new. The only marking in the book was inside the front cover, and I am very pleased with the seller and the product.

5-0 out of 5 stars Great referance book
Perfect condition I liked this book because it gave me some great examples of real people with similar problems to my own that I could relate with

5-0 out of 5 stars Book Review
This book is excellent.It had great stories and examples and helpful information on how to deal with the "hard to deal with" adolescent.I've used a few of the suggestions and they seem to be working.I wish the author were from my area -- I'd make an appointment in a minute! ... Read more


47. Parenting Gifted Kids: Tips for Raising Happy And Successful Children
by James R. Delisle
Paperback: 213 Pages (2006-04-01)
list price: US$16.95 -- used & new: US$9.26
(price subject to change: see help)
Asin: 1593631790
Average Customer Review: 4.5 out of 5 stars
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Editorial Review

Product Description
Parenting Gifted Kids: Tips for Raising Happy and Successful Children provides a humorous, engaging, and encouraging look at raising gifted children today. Jim Delisle, Ph.D., offers practical, down-to-earth advice that will cause parents to reexamine the ways they perceive and relate to their children.

Delisle puts forth 10 "tips" to parents of gifted children—ideas that reflect attitude and approach and allow for introspection and change, rather than quick, do-it-tonight solutions. Some topics of interest include understanding a child's giftedness, working with the school system, dealing with perfectionism in gifted kids, and being adult role models for children. Along the way, stories from gifted children and their parents provide insight into the lives of these individuals.

Educational Resource ... Read more

Customer Reviews (17)

2-0 out of 5 stars Kids Reaching Their Potential
I hope my children never reach their full potential and continue to be intrigued and inspired by learning, creating and the adventure of continued development.

I appreciated the perspective James Delisle takes with Parenting Gifted Kids: Tips for Raising Happy And Successful Children. In the forward he writes that other books on the same topic make very common sense statements like "let your child live her own life, not yours" or "make it safe for your child to learn through mistakes." Then says the purpose of these other books is to reinforce the importance of "Nurture your children's independence and creativity so the will reach their "full potential."" However, even though the idea is good his perspective is colored by a need to place students in categories.

First of all, he does have useful use-it-right-now information in this book in terms of attitudes and our thinking about giftedness. But he falls apart when he maintains an attitude of labels and misses the mark on Renzulli's work by a mile. At first I was pleased to find him reference Joseph Renzulli's Three-Ring conception of giftedness [1978] (1) above average intelligence, (2) creativity and how will it be measured [see Dr Donald Treffinger) and (3) sustained effort to produce some product that proves the gift. But then I realized he didn't read it, I take a good deal of exception to Delisle's narrow and incomplete view of Renzulli's work. In fact, I would highly recommend Light Up Your Child's Mind: Finding a Unique Pathway to Happiness and Success It is an excellent resource for anyone remotely interested in seeing their child advance and engage, no matter what test score they have.

Although the author does spare us the tedious and obvious failings of any test to indicate gifts in children he pours fuel on the fire of "haves" and "Have Nots" which in my opinion serves no one - especially the kids labeled gifted based on a single test that may or may not be valid for that child at that particular time.If you are interested in the dangers of labels, even positive labels, like "gifted" refer to Mindset: The New Psychology of Success In chapter 3, The Truth About Ability and Achievement, shows that in repeated studies prove that positive labels like "your gifted" actually undermine a child's willingness to challenge them self and further their abilities.To his credit he states, "Placing assumptions on your child due to a one-word label - gifted - places you smack in the danger zone of unrealistic expectations." But after that he misses again by talking about how it could be disappointing for the parents when their "gifted" child can't juggle multiple projects like the of other gifted kids or gets detention. In my opinion, he is missing the point, in should be about the parent's expectations, the child will change, the gift will change and the expectations have to be fluid. Put the focus on what the child is capable of and helping them expand their expectations of them self. Go back to letting every kid make mistakes and let everyone know that "gifts" are like finger prints, unique in subtle ways.

This book does have merit and solid information, but for an author to say that he's writing this book that is about attitudes toward gifted kids he has missed the mark. If this is you first book on gifted kids keep looking or at least take this with a grain of salt.

5-0 out of 5 stars The ONE to read!
I have read countless books and spent hours online researching "gifted" children topics.This book's format really put it all into perspective for me.I suddenly "got" my sons and have looked and dealt with them in a different way and as a result, has eased a lot of frustration in our family.

5-0 out of 5 stars Excellent parent resource
I have been an educator for many years, and I have often worked with gifted children either in the regular classroom or in a special program, so I can say that I am very familiar with what the author is talking about and highly recommend this book. I would say you can call this a parents survival guide and every parent should read it - not just the parents of gifted kids.

Delisle's research and years of experience are presented in an easily understood and common sense style that makes the reading very enjoyable instead of dry and scientific. His examples are drawn from real life and his tips and methods are right on target. I especailly liked his suggestion about school to "never request a teacher, always request a style" which makes so much sense. He provides excellent methods for working not only with your child, but with the educational system and other people in your child's life.

Too often our children are stunted because of a lack of understanding from adults, and now Delisle has provided some excellent methods for encouraging a healthy and varied/balanced life for gifted children, and these ideas can be applied to all children.

5-0 out of 5 stars Stop wasting your child's time and intellect. Avoid underachievement.
The well written Chapter 2 "Better At vs. Better Than" seems to conflict with the author's desire that gifted children (and adults) wear the title "Gifted" on their sleeves. It does appear to be useful for teachers and administrators to label certain learners as "gifted," but in general conversation I think I prefer that family, friends, and educators refer to my child according to his specific gifts, rather than just throw around the elitist and nebulous "gifted" title; when you read the extensive definitions of the term ([...]) I think most practical people would agree.
The latter half of this book included this theme and a couple others that were underdeveloped or just overly philosophical.The rest of the book was awesome; full of practical information and experiences that is expanding our capability to visualize not only what our child can become, but what he can be right now. I whole-heartedly endorse this book to any parent that wants to make sure that their child is stimulated, productive, happy, fulfilled and a lover of learning in general.What mom and me learned from this book will definately help us avoid the common pitfalls of raising children that are constantly exceeding expectations.

5-0 out of 5 stars Great Resource
I'm very much enjoying the advice provided in James Delisle's "Parenting Gifted Kids." I purchased it because several people recommended it to me. It's full of helpful perspective about the topic of giftedness, and excellent thoughts on how our children fit into the public school systems (or don't). Worth reading. ... Read more


48. The Co-Parenting Survival Guide: Letting Go of Conflict after a Difficult Divorce
by Elizabeth Thayer Ph.D., Jeffrey Zimmerman Ph.D.
Paperback: 194 Pages (2001-07-10)
list price: US$16.95 -- used & new: US$9.51
(price subject to change: see help)
Asin: 1572242450
Average Customer Review: 4.5 out of 5 stars
Canada | United Kingdom | Germany | France | Japan
Editorial Review

Product Description
This book helps parents in the aftermath of divorce learn to sustain a healthy co-parenting relationship. “Conflict and Parenting” explores parental conflict and its effects on children, conflict resolution, and the importance of forging a co-parenting relationship. “Co-Parenting Guidelines” offers specifics for solving day-to-day problems, disciplining, and handling conflict during transitional times and special events. ... Read more

Customer Reviews (16)

5-0 out of 5 stars Most important book I've ever read...
...and I was an English major, so I've read a lot of books.

During our separation, my wife and I were in parent coordination and on a direct course for a custody evaluation and full-blown custody fight.We both were sure that we were "high-conflict," and could barely speak to each other without expressing hostility, contempt and mistrust, even in front of our kids.Despite having our own lawyers and shrinks, a mediator, and a parent coordinator, nobody noticed that our pendente lite parenting plan was horrible with all its transitions.It increased our conflict. Nobody told me stop fighting for more parenting time at the expense of quality parenting time.Nobody stopped the madness to point out that my wife and I actually agreed on a whole lot more than what we disagreed on.

Our parent coordinator suggested that we read "Joint Custody with a Jerk."Obviously, she didn't get us.The title alone was a turn-off to both of us.So, in reading the amazon reviews for "Jerk," I found this book.Amazingly, reading it has turned everything around for us.

Based on the guidance in this book, I discovered that our acrimony in trying to co-parent was pretty much just the residue of the conflict that ended our marriage (exacerbated by our "support networks").I realized that we trusted each other in most aspects of parenting (as opposed to being a spouse) and, therefore, could (and should) discuss our infrequent differences in parenting in a respectful, business-like way.Of the four levels of conflict outlined in this book (level 1 being cooperative, level 4 being high-conflict), I was amazed to discover that we were only level 2 with just moments of level 4 from time to time.Level 1 seemed within reach.This book gives you a concise, no-nonsense road map to getting there.

Since reading this book and putting its guidance in practice, my wife and I decided to dump our parent coordinator and worked out a permanent parenting plan, just the two of us, without the presence of lawyers or any other paid professionals.Transitions have become relatively pleasant.My divorce-related stress has decreased to a fraction of what it was.

It's tough work not to revert.The theme of this book is that co-parents must extinguish their conflict addiction because it is harmful to your kids, to your relationship with them, and, ultimately, to yourself.The bitter medicine that this book prescribes is that you must communicate with your co-parent *more* than you did before you divorced--more than when you were happily married even.Sounds ridiculous, right?It's not.If you can buy-in to that, you're on your way.

If you're a divorced parent, read this book; take the medicine; and figure out a way to talk to your co-parent--a lot.You'll be grateful to the authors, like I am.

5-0 out of 5 stars Excellent resource.
I have read many books on co-parenting with a less-than-ideal Dad. (or Mom)This one is down to earth and very informative.It is written focusing on what the children need from co-parents instead of how the co-parents should get along.After all, both want the best for their children, don't we?

2-0 out of 5 stars Little guidance on what to do with an uncooperative coparent
This book was wonderfully insightful about how to handle co-parenting on all levels.Yet, it failed to offer ANY suggestions as to what to do with an ex-spouse that was not at all interested in cooperating. ...Maybe in the next edition they will address this very real reality of some divorces...

5-0 out of 5 stars The Co-Parenting Survival Guide
This is one of the best books written about how a co-parenting relationship works, and why it is so important for children. We recommend this book to nearly every parent who comes to the Kids First Center for guidance. This book talks about how parents sometimes become addicted to conflict and that it is not necessarily divorce that hurts kids, it's continued conflict.
If you are a parent going through divorce, or a professional who works with these parents, buy this book. And if you really want to know how the kids are feeling buy Kids First: What Kids Want Grown-ups to Know about Separation & Divorce.

4-0 out of 5 stars Puts you in the right frame of mind
I think this a book well written to appeal to parents that really want the best for their kids, but have problems getting past their own anger and agenda. It's also done in a strong, but not admonishing tone that certainly connected with me.

I found the sample eMail exchanges in the book to be frighteningly familiar. It was almost as if someone had eavesdropped into some of my conversations with my kids' mom. It made me realize this is a common problem and also how silly some of that 'exchange' was by seeing someone else do it.

I also found that our conflict issues were no where near as bad as they can get in others. At least I felt good that our conflicts were petty and easier to resolve.

You also don't have to have both parents read the book - although it would help. I was the only one that read it - actually prior to a co-parenting mediation session - and it really put me into a very constructive frame of mind that focused on our kids rather than 'being right'. It really helped us resolve some conflicts we were having in just a couple sessions.

Great book, if nothing else to put the reader in a good place from which to operate in the best interests of the kids. ... Read more


49. Parenting Adopted Adolescents: Understanding and Appreciating Their Journeys
by Gregory C Keck
Paperback: 240 Pages (2009-06-15)
list price: US$17.99 -- used & new: US$8.23
(price subject to change: see help)
Asin: 1600062814
Average Customer Review: 5.0 out of 5 stars
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In his newest release, Dr. Gregory C. Keck offers new insights and parenting strategies relative to adolescents, especially adopted adolescents. Parents will find humor and relief as they realize their role in their child’s journey.
... Read more

Customer Reviews (4)

5-0 out of 5 stars Excellent for adoptive parents of older children
We are newly adoptive parents of a 13 year-old.I have read several books throughout our adoption journey and this was the first I have read that is specifically geared towards parents adopting and parenting older kids.The book was very easy to read and had some great insight into the challenges of parenting kids that have been in the foster care system.

5-0 out of 5 stars Practical advice that works!
Gregory Keck., PhD knows what he is talking about and has the experience to back it up.His approach in offering advice with humor, in everyday language, and with his own experience as an adoptive dad made this book an easy read.This book is full of helpful insights about teens weither adoptive and biological.Instead of getting my head filled with terms and facts that I can't use, I was given practical advice and knowledge to inspire my adolescence to get through the most difficult journey of their lives. I have found Mr.Keck advice very helpful.

Tammy Mahan A foster/adoptive mom and social worker for the last 21 years in child Welfare.

5-0 out of 5 stars Adopted adolescents can be understood and appreciated!
I am so happy that this book was released before my three adopted children reach adolescence.The hopeful message that Dr. Keck shares leaves me excited rather than fearful when I think about sharing my childrens' journey.Dr. Keck's blend of humor, guidance and common sense, grounded in sound developmetal theory, has me convinced that it will be possible to enjoy my children during this period of their lives.If that seems impossible to you, you need to read this book!Dr. Keck's ability to reframe many adolescent behaviors as necessary and appropriate developmental tasks gives me as a parent new ways to interpret and respond to my children.Dr. Keck explores issues such as identity, loss and abandonment, challenging behariors, sexuality,and transracial and transcultural issues. Each chapter left me feeling more prepared.This is a book I will be referring to often.Reading it was like having a conversation with a trusted friend.

5-0 out of 5 stars Great resource for parents and professionals
Keck's latest book, Parenting Adopted Adolescents, is a thoroughly enjoyable read - conversational in tone, filled with practical advice, and humorous without being flip. The tack Keck takes is there in the title subtext: appreciation. It serves us parents well to check in on that emotion and value. Through our appreciation of our adolescent children in all that they are, we become better parents and they closer to achieving their best.

The book is organized around some very basic concepts. Beginning with normative developmental stages, moving through the core issues of adoption, trans -racial and -cultural issues, attachment, sexuality, therapeutic interventions and more, Keck addresses virtually every subject that parents negotiate on a daily basis.

The format is one I appreciate when reading any "help" book. Clinical information and analysis is followed by case examples that bring to life the points the author is making. As I read, I could see my family and myself in the stories - both optimal and hopelessly futile - and gained a sense that we all are muddling through this journey together. Sure we make mistakes, but they can be ameliorated with time, patience, understanding and acceptance.

Both logic and the obvious memory of once being an adolescent shape the very practical advice given throughout the book. Some of which I've actually used and seen work! Among some of the gems are the following:
* That although much of an adolescent's behavior is intentional, i.e. he meant to do it, the consequences and resultant adult feelings are NOT the intent. "When adopted adolescents reject others, their intention is usually not to cause hurt but to avoid being rejected themselves."
* Lighten up on the myriad ways adolescents try to express their individuality and find their way. "Adults typically talk about peer pressure only when discussing negative[s]... It is rare to accuse an honor student of studying so hard just because his friends do."
* "When parents believe that a single magical strategy will resolve all psychological or behavioral problems, they tend to rely on the strategy as opposed to relying on the relationship with their child."
* Try talking to your child(ren) the way you do people who are not in your family and see what the result is. Conversely, and perhaps more risky, try talking to your colleagues the way you talk to your adolescent and observe the result. Hmmm...
* And finally... Avoid control battles at all costs
* Win the ones you take on
* Pick and choose your battles carefully

The various challenges that adolescents can throw our way are described not as problems, but as expected and predictable developmental stages. In this way the reader is able to normalize what may be feeling like a completely out-of-control existence. For example, when referring to the "honeymoon period" that all adoptive parents know about, Keck draws a comparison to a new employee being on her best behavior at the job before settling in and becoming comfortable. It is a refreshing break from much of the writing out there about adopted children and adolescents that talks about pathology, projected outcomes, and warning signs. While these are important issues, not to be lightly dismissed, it is wise to start at a place of strength, hope and normalcy.

Kim Stevens, Project Manager, North American Council on Adoptable Children ... Read more


50. Parenting Isn't for Cowards: The 'You Can Do It' Guide for Hassled Parents from America's Best-Loved Family Advocate
by James C. Dobson
Paperback: 240 Pages (2007-04-16)
list price: US$14.99 -- used & new: US$8.88
(price subject to change: see help)
Asin: 1414317468
Average Customer Review: 5.0 out of 5 stars
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Product Description
Does your heart skip a beat when you think of all that could go wrong in the parenting years ahead? Anxiety is normal, but your worst fears don’t have to become reality. Speaking both as a therapist and a father—and drawing on a landmark study of thirty-five thousand parents—Dr. James Dobson helps you . . .

  • prevent child-rearing troubles before they happen
  • banish your guilt about hard-to-raise children
  • protect your sanity during a child’s adolescence
  • restore your energy when you’re facing burnout
  • enhance your relationships with your kids
With more than one million copies sold, this confidence-building classic will help you experience the full joy of parenthood—and what may be the greatest sense of fulfillment you’ll ever know. ... Read more

Customer Reviews (3)

5-0 out of 5 stars Down-to-earth advice regarding how to raise Godly children
Dr. Dobson provides clear, helpful advice for parents to support us in our role as the primary educator of our children.His advice is of particular importance for any parent of a strong-willed child.As a mother of 7, I found his advice to be very helpful.(The only place I disagree is when he recommends that you wait to have children.)If you are bewildered how your "little blessing" seemed to turn into a "little terror"...have hope and read this book!If you want to know how to parent a little spitfire...read this book.Very encouraging!You can do it!

5-0 out of 5 stars The Title Says It All
THere is really nothing else to say - If you don't have the guts to do it right - get a dog instead.

5-0 out of 5 stars Parenting Isn't for Cowards
One of the best parenting books I've read.It's refreshing and encouraging as well. ... Read more


51. The Enneagram of Parenting: The 9 Types of Children and How to Raise Them Successfully
by Elizabeth Wagele
Paperback: 176 Pages (1997-03-12)
list price: US$15.99 -- used & new: US$9.13
(price subject to change: see help)
Asin: 0062514555
Average Customer Review: 4.0 out of 5 stars
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Product Description
Elizabeth Wagele, coauthor of The Enneagram Made Easy and Are You My Type, Am I Yours?, offers the first practical guidebook for parents -- packed with her delightful cartoons -- on how the Enneagram can help to understand and work with children's personality traits and behavioral patterns more effectively and creatively. Using her expertise in making the Enneagram accessible through simple text and zany, informative cartoons, Wagele shows parents how to be flexible and compassionate, willing and eager to recognize the unique potential of every child and to respond to and nurture each child appropriately. ... Read more

Customer Reviews (5)

4-0 out of 5 stars useful addition to your parenting toolkit
Another great enneagram book by Elizabeth Wagele, filled with witty, on-point cartoons and examples.For those familiar with the principles of the enneagram, this book provides useful guidance for determining type in children and applying the enneagram principles to parenting and other interactions with children.

The book provides great kid-specific examples and "personality quiz" checklists for determining type in children.For each of the nine types, the book provides a brief discussion on how to approach ten common problems -- which include getting to school on time, study habits manners, getting along with others, sleeping & eating habits, standing up for themselves, decision-making, get up and go, emotional maturity, responsibility.The book also provides a brief description of enneagram types in parenting, though that is certainly not the focus of the book.

Two things stand out in this book.First -- the fantastic and plentiful illustrations.I particularly like the cartoons that show all nine types in a single situation -- for example, in "The Enneagram of Embryos", the two embryo asserts his love for Mommy and Daddy and can't wait to meet them, the six wonders if they'll like babies, if his mattress will be too hard, if he will like the food, and the seven is begging to be let out -- as "I've got places to go and people to meet."In "The Enneagram of Nosebleeds", the one hopes the nosebleed doesn't interfere with his putting his toys away, the two enjoys the attention, the four imagines her own tragic death, and the 5 relishes the opportunity to examine human blood under a microscope.I also particularly like the type-specific suggestions for dealing with behavioral issues.The enneagram recognizes that not all children share the same concerns and are motivated in the same way about the book is the

I wouldn't recommend this book as an introduction to the enneagram (Try The Enneagram Made Easy instead) or as a comprehensive parenting guide, but as one tool in your parenting toolbox or as an expansion of your understanding of the enneagram in adults, this is a great addition.

5-0 out of 5 stars Kid personality = practical tips!
It's easy to pick out your child's type.The advice that follows is priceless!!Practical tips for dealing with common parent/child conflicts like eating, getting ready for school, doing homework... are demystified for each type of child.

2-0 out of 5 stars Disappointing
This is a very simplistic rendition of the theory of the enneagram meant to be specifically for understanding children. If you're looking for simplicity you'll enjoy its brevity and the often humorous cartoon drawings of various "types" of kids and their responses to everyday situations throughout the book. If you have any knowledge of the enneagram already you're more likely to find it dull. There is very little detail, and the descriptions of types are rather perfunctory. There is no discussion of how a particular type of parent might interact with a particular type of child.

Each type gets its own chapter with a ten question quiz suggesting whether or now your child might be this type, followed by several pages of illustrative cartoons, and then a few pages discussing the "common problems" of each child. The "problems" display the author's view of child raising: no. 1 is "getting to school on time", 2 is "study habits" and 3 is "manners".

I would recommend getting a decent general book about the enneagram, and/or a decent parenting book instead.

5-0 out of 5 stars Concise Yet Thorough and Thoroughly Engaging Reference Book
I am a psychiatrist, but all of uswho are trying to be good parents tend to try to treat our children like we wish we had been treated: in my case I have a natural tendency to try to provide my children with as many stimulating opportunities as possible.But I am a 7 in the Enneagram system and my children are not! So it is a constant reminder for me that my little 9 daughter would rather cuddle than go to theme parks, while my little 8 daughter wants more and more action!Elizaeth has written a fabulous, concise, book reminding us of the interactions between parents of one type and children of another.A book that is both essential and ahead of its time.

5-0 out of 5 stars It was an eye-opener to see kids from "their" point of view!
With great wit, humor and gentle humanness, Elizabeth invites us to explore the inner worlds of our children.If you have kids, know kids or teach kids, don't miss it! L.Forget ... Read more


52. Positive Discipline A-Z: 1001 Solutions to Everyday Parenting Problems (Positive Discipline Library)
by Jane Nelsen Ed.D., Lynn Lott, H. Stephen Glenn
Paperback: 336 Pages (2007-03-27)
list price: US$16.99 -- used & new: US$8.58
(price subject to change: see help)
Asin: 0307345572
Average Customer Review: 4.5 out of 5 stars
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Product Description
As a parent, you face one of the most challenging—and rewarding—roles of your life. No matter how much you love your child, there will still be moments filled with anger, frustration, and, at times, desperation. What do you do? Over the years, millions of parents just like you have come to trust the Positive Discipline series for its consistent, commonsense approach to child rearing. In this completely updated edition of Positive Discipline A–Z, you will learn how to use methods to raise a child who is responsible, respectful, and resourceful. You’ll find practical solutions to such parenting challenges as:

- Sibling Rivalry
- Bedtime Hassles
- School Problems
- Getting Chores Done
- ADHD ·Eating Problems
- Procrastination
- Whining
- Tattling and Lying
- Homework Battles
- And Dozens More!

This newly revised and expanded third edition contains up-to-the-minute information on sleeping through the night, back talk, and lack of motivation as well as tips on diet, exercise, and obesity prevention, and new approaches to parenting in the age of computers and cell phones.Amazon.com Review
The first edition of Positive Discipline A-Z becamea classic child-rearing text that helped change the way parents andexperts feel about discipline. In this revised and expanded version,child psychologist Jane Nelson (coauthor of the entire PositiveDiscipline series) teams up with speaker and therapist Lynn Lott andH. Stephen Glenn (Raising Self-ReliantChildren). Positive Discipline is based on the theoriesof child development expert Rudolf Dreikurs, and uses communication,consistency, and specific techniques (such as the four-stepfollow-through method, taking time for training, givingage-appropriate chores to teach responsibility, and using positivetime-outs in which the child takes some time with a calming activity)to help children develop the life skills they need to be "effective,happy, contributing, and respectful members of the family andsociety."

The first part of the text provides an introduction tothe concept of positive discipline and its tools. The second part ofthe book is an alphabetical breakdown of more than 100 child-rearingtopics, from addiction to zits--including cruelty to animals,fairness, laundry, negative children, pampering, self-esteem,tattling, whining, and much more. Here, the authors move from generaltheory to specific suggestions and approaches for hard-core parentingissues. Whether read for theory or read for specificity, this book isterrific--and important. --Ericka Lutz ... Read more

Customer Reviews (23)

5-0 out of 5 stars Awful toddlerhood stage? Then read this book!
I've been experiencing power struggles, tantrums, crying, and disobedience with my 2 yr old son. So far, I was unsuccessful and did not see lasting/positive results with timeout, rules, yelling, and occasional spanking. Actually, I despise these parenting methods, they go against the very core in which we all are... LOVE!

I've read a handful of parenting books the last couple years and am pleasantly surprised with my current reading of "Positive Discipline A-Z" from Jane Nelson. I wish I had it sooner!! Actually I wish I can instantly transform my parenting into all of the 316 pages in her book!

I'm not completely finished reading the entire book because I have been trying to incorporate some of the lessons in the first part of the book. It seems to take a lot of effort to try to break the previous bad parenting habits, like talking too much! So far, I've tried to "Act, Don't Talk" more & be more kind instead of only firm. I'm trying to avoid "timeout" so we can focus on the underlying issue beneath the "bad" behavior. I plan to incorporate more of her lessons until I've managed to form a loving, cooperate home for him to thrive in!

Dr. Jane's method is all about respect and allowing your child be who he is while providing long-lasting teachable moments. Life skills children can learn. "Positive Discipline is not about punishment or control. Rather it is about instructing, educating, preparing, training, regulating, skill building, and focusing on solutions. Positive Discipline is constructive, encouraging, affirming, helpful, loving, and optimistic." If your finding yourself in a similar situation of the awful toddlerhood stage then you have to read this book!

4-0 out of 5 stars Decent book but with some conflicting advice
I think this is a good book for someone who has a more authoritarian parenting style and is looking for middle ground between that and true gentle discipline. I think there are some excellent tips and I appreciate the A-Z categorization for easy reference. What I found conflicting was the advice given for sleep and a small tidbit regarding breastfeeding. While the authors respect the choice of parents who co-sleep, they take a very firm stance against it and advocate for Ferberizing/CIO. I find this conflicting because the rest of the book encourages parents to support the emotional well-being of their children and yet they should abandon that at the bedroom door? I think the authors would have done a better service to their readers if they actually examined ways to gently encourage better sleep habits (and yes they do exist).

They should also examine current research in regards to "Crying it Out" and the negative effects it has on infant brain development, in addition to attachment theory and the importance of responding to infant cries for communication. The greatest injustice a parent can do to their children and themselves is ignore their intuition when something feels wrong, and I was sad to see the authors encouraging this. In addition, I'm unaware of any lactation training that either author has, but they also encourage night weaning at 3 months of age. Anyone with even a smidgen of lactation training knows what a bad idea this is, and I would encourage readers to go elsewhere for accurate advice, such as La Leche League.

All in all it's a decent book, like many books you take some information and you leave some.

5-0 out of 5 stars A La Carte Parenting Solutions: effective, fast, simple, kind
Do you need fast, effective, AND thoughtful solutions to your everday parenting challenges with your children?Of course!That's why you're reading reviews on parenting books!

This one is organized effectively and consistently so that a busy parent can take in the core concepts of positive discipline and apply it directly at the most common yet at the same time very trying parenting challenges. For every concept, common challenges are used to demonstrate the problem and solution.

The core principles of this book use the rather new tenets of developing field of Positive Psychology.You know that popular cliche?"The carrot works better than the stick?"

Here's my favorite:my 6 year old son is now getting school homework.Obviously, the end goal is to have him do his homework.
Old School Method:don't use your mind. Just yell at the kid while whacking their behind if he doesn't do it!
After reading the book:I hand my son the kitchen timer and asked him to enter the number of minutes he'd like to play before doing his homework.My only rule was that he needs to start his homework before 5:30pm.He now has ownership of this decision.He also realizes that after he's done with his homework he can play as much as he wants before dinner.

Wow.Clever, simple, oh-so-effective, and thoughtful.

4-0 out of 5 stars A lot of great take-aways
Since reading this book (~30 days ago), I have put three suggestions into play at our house.

1) "I notice..."As in, "I notice it took you 15 minutes to brush your teeth.Do you want to tell me about that?"Followed up with listening.Or, "I notice that you have not eaten your carrots.What is your plan?"My very verbal four-year-old has started saying it to me -- wow!He said, "Mommy I notice that you forgot to read me a story.I want to choose it today."

2) Choices.As in, "Good morning, darling! (hug) You told me you'd like to make your own lunch today.You can choose to get ready for school quickly and come make your lunch, or you can take your time and I will make it all by myself.I'll start making lunches at 7:15.I love you, sweetie! (kiss) Don't forget breakfast is at 7:30!Yumm yumm!"Or like this, with a pre-schooler: "Tomorrow is crazy-shirt day at school.Do you choose this shirt or this shirt?Great choice!I'll hang it on your hook so you can get ready all by yourself in the morning."

3) Make sure you are in the same room before making requests of children.I have mentally added ("or husband") at the end of that statement.This has cut down on a lot of me repeating myself, which makes me a happier mom!

The whole act-don't-talk philosophy is lovely.I'm getting a lot of mileage out of it.And I use this phrase all the time: "You kids are very creative.I'm sure you'll imagine a way to get that done.I can't wait to hear how you work it out!"It has put a quick stop to tattling and arguing.

As a rule, I believe that parents need to be in charge at home.Parents set the tone for the whole family.This book will help you do that.

5-0 out of 5 stars Simply the best!
Positive Discipline Dr. Jane Nelsen's Positive Discipline books for parents should be manadatory reading for all parents and teachers. She puts the responsiblity squarely where it belongs - on the adult - and shows us we don't have to use corporal punishment, sarcasm, yelling and screaming to raise or teach a child of any age. A wonderful side benefit of Postivie Discipline is the improvement you can make in ALL relationships in life by putting these principles into practice. As Jane says, and I paraphrase, "Who ever got the crazy idea you could make people do better by making them feel worse?" If we would put ourselves in our child's shoes while we're yelling at them trying to correct them or make a point, or worse hitting them because they did something wrong, we would stop such nonsense in a second. Put her simple and very effective techniques into practice and you'll find a remarkable change occur in the relationships you have with your children. Check out [...] too - there's lots of free stuff there along with great articles. ... Read more


53. What The Bible Says About Parenting Biblical Principle For Raising Godly Children
by John MacArthur
Paperback: 256 Pages (2000-04-18)
list price: US$14.99 -- used & new: US$8.49
(price subject to change: see help)
Asin: 0849937752
Average Customer Review: 4.5 out of 5 stars
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More than ever, Christians need to know what the Bible actually teaches about parenting, and put it into practice. In What the Bible Says About Parenting, pastor/teacher John MacArthure presents time-proven principles of biblical parenting clearly and carefully to help parents make sense of their duties before God and to bring up their children in the ways of the Lord. In addition to this new trade paper edition (previously titled Successful Christian Parenting), there is also a resource kit and two workbooks available to help Christian parents instruct their children in a godly manner.

... Read more

Customer Reviews (11)

5-0 out of 5 stars parental guidence
So far the book is great. I am only reading a little at a time, but it is very helpful.

5-0 out of 5 stars What the Bible Says About Parenting- John MacArthur
This is an excellent tool when seeking guidance for scripture pertaining to parenting.This book is a must read for all parents!!!Enjoy!

5-0 out of 5 stars THE BEST!
THE BEST. Excellent. I highly recommend.
As with all of Dr. John Macarthur's works, this is
packed with life changing Biblical TRUTHS, wisdom and sound doctrine.

5-0 out of 5 stars Psychology is Good, Bible is Better
In our culture, there are many concepts and theories, assumptions and views on how to raise children. Often, studies in the areas of Psychology and Human Development, Sociology, Medicine, and so forth, come to different conclusions, sometimes even contradictory. Studies in other cultures again have different views. Then there is the Christian sub-culture, with all its very helpful seminars, books, audio tapes, magazines, etc. But these usually draw their ideas from one or more of those same studies, and end up contradicting each other.

I don't want to discredit Christian educators, child psychologists, and so forth. They are playing an incredibly important part in helping parents understand their role; for instance, I believe that Focus on the Family, and James Dobson, THE contemporary parenting "guru", had and still has a huge influence on how families raise their children, and I am thankful for that.

If you are parents, or getting there :-), I encourage you to get your hands on some good books from Focus. However, when the theories of the books we read, Christian or not, contradict each other, then we're stuck. How can we really KNOW the best way to raise our children? The answer is quite obvious: Read the Bible!

You might argue that many things in the Bible are either old-fashioned, from another culture, and simply not applicable in our time. You're right, not everything applies to us. But everything can serve to teach us something, to educate us.

When the Apostle Paul wrote his letters, no one had a degree in Child Psychology; no one had heard about ADHD or other such "problems". But when Paul wrote, his thoughts were guided by the Holy Spirit, and He transcends time and culture. We still have to use our brains :-) when we read Scripture, to find out what things meant to the original writers and readers, and what it means for us today. But, if you want to know how to raise your children, then DO read the Bible, MORE than any other book.
John MacArthur has done a study on parenting, from the Bible. This book is the result of this study.

If you want to get the BASICS of parenting right, I strongly encourage you to get a copy. It is filled with quotes from Scripture and excellent advice. If, after reading it, you think it was not worth your time or money, then read it again, you must have missed something! This book is not written to give you the latest tips and ideas on parenting, but to give you a foundation on which to build your family and home.

Put it this way: if I were teaching Parenting 101 at a Bible College, this would be the required textbook (for Parenting 201, I'd require many different ones, most of them probably from Focus on the Family).

Please remember: I believe MacArthur does a good job explaining the Scriptures, focusing on what God wants us to know and do in our families. However, don't read the book like you read the Bible. John MacArthur is not God :-) You might find that some of his interpretations and views clash with yours. That's ok. You might be right. You might not be. For instance, he supports spanking (based on Scripture; Proverbs 13:24). I agree with that, but I'm not saying that spanking is a must. Regardless of your view on different things and issues, read this book with an open mind and see how God might use this tool to challenge and equip you to be(come) better parents.

5-0 out of 5 stars Very Very Good Book
This book is perfect for anyone who takes Scripture seriously, and is either thinking of having or currently has children.John MacArthur is very true to God's Word, is very open and honest, and provides wonderful direction for raising children in the love and admonition of the Lord.Some of the truths he presents are not popular, especially today, but they are very biblical.

Not a pseudo-Christian "self-help" book, this book provides a wonderful blueprint for raising children, teaching them about salvation, and encouraging them to serve the Lord all from a firmly biblical standpoint. ... Read more


54. Self Parenting: The Complete Guide to Your Inner Conversations
by John K. Pollard
 Paperback: 276 Pages (1987-02-01)
list price: US$16.95 -- used & new: US$12.89
(price subject to change: see help)
Asin: 094205525X
Average Customer Review: 5.0 out of 5 stars
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Product Description
SELF-PARENTING: The Complete Guide to Your Inner Conversations is the classic and original how-to book defining the concept of "self-parenting." Many of us grew up within a parental environment that did not support our childhood needs for love, support, and nurturing. As adults, we mentally continue the same patterns as an "Inner Parent" that left us feeling alone and abandoned as a child. By beginning the daily practice of positive Self-Parenting, the negative outer parenting patterns taught as a child (and subsequently internalized as an adult) can be recognized and reversed. The foundation of the SELF-PARENTING is the daily practice of the Self-Parenting Exercises, a thirty-minute session of cognitive interaction between the Inner Parent and Inner Child. During these daily half-hour sessions Illustrated In the book, the reader learns how to love, support, and nurture his or her Inner Child as well as increase their awareness of the profound implications of their Inner Conversations in the "real world." ... Read more

Customer Reviews (12)

5-0 out of 5 stars Self-Parenting is a self-therapeutic technique that can REALLY transform you!
Greetings from Istanbul!

I've found about Self-Parenting (SP) about 323 days ago and today I've completed my 320th SP session (+ 10.5 months). I can easily and wholeheartedly say that my life is not the same since I learned about this profound technique. I consider myself very lucky and privileged to discover SP as well as to meet Dr John Pollard so early in my self-growth journey (5 years in total).

If you really want to "change" yourself and your life, this is the best way that I have ever experienced! When you order "SELF-PARENTING: The Complete Guide To Your Inner Conversations" (ie yellow book) and "The Self-Parenting Program: Core Guidelines for the SELF-PARENTING Practitioner" (ie blue book), you don't only get these books but also a brand new and complete system called Self-Parenting Program. I feel Dr. Pollard's other book "How Relationships Work" would also complement this program to excellence.

In a recent morning session my Inner Child has commented about this Self-Parenting Program as below:

"Learn this, everyone! This is a new language, it is a bit hard to learn it but it is well worth the effort."
"This is the best thing that has happened to me! It gave me a chance to express myself and to be heard by you whereas beforehand I was abandoned. I want to thank you for learning this new language"
"Are you aware how special is this? I am savoring happiness, intimacy, and continuity (consistency) with this program."

As my Inner Child says it is a new but advanced language which promises you many positive changes that you could NOT have imagined beforehand in your life given you follow the program and its guidelines word by word. Or else you will be drawn in the raging river!

Why do I find Dr Pollard's books and SPP so superior and advanced?

First of all, here you are the captain of your life journey and self-discovery. You don't need anyone else in this life journey, only guidance to check if you are at the right track. You finally realize that you "can" and "are" in charge of your own life and your Inner Child. You do actually become your own therapist.

You gradually but surely become conscious of old programmings and conditionings acquired from parents, friends, schooling, culture etc and start to have your own natural self-parenting style that is democratic, loving and caring to your own Inner Child.

As you accumulate more hours of SP sessions which I would describe as the intimate and nurturing setting for Inner Parent and Inner Child interaction, you start to expand this brand new style of treatment to your own Inner Child outside the sessions ie into real world. At some point you stop giving "automatic" or "learned" reactions but rather spontaneous responses irrelevant to past conditions and experiences.

You don't specifically work on your outer relationships in SP sessions, yet your outer relations also automatically improve as you really start to love and care for your Inner Child.

I would lastly say if you are really looking for a "permanent" and right (there are no short cuts here!) solution to your recurring personal problems, you need to read first the "SELF-PARENTING: The Complete Guide To Your Inner Conversations" If you are determined to stay within the rules of SPP and allocate daily 30 minutes to the most important relationship of your own life, you will find all the answers leading to a fulfilling and happy life first inside, then in outside world.

Sibel

5-0 out of 5 stars An excellent discussion on identifying and dealing with the inner child
John Pollard brings us an excellent discussion on identifying and dealing with the inner child. This is an aspect of ourselves that is most often well outside our conscious awareness. This part of ourselves is not just the memories of our early life, the residues of our uncompleted dreams, and scars from challenging and traumatic childhood experiences. It is a living, thinking, feeling and often willful aspect of our adult self that may have a life of its own if we are not in harmony with it.

This aspect of ourselves has been noted in psychoanalytic terms as the id and in Transactional Analysis as the Child Ego State. This Child part of ourselves seeks pleasure; wants what it wants when it wants it; brings enthusiasm and curiosity to our cogitations, actions and interactions; wants approval and affection; and may respond to perceived negativity with feelings of hurt, anger and rebellion. We also have an inner Parent and inner Adult - the executive part of ourselves that makes logical, reasoned decisions for courses of action based on available information.

We tend to think of a child in relationship with other adults, particularly the child's parents. With the inner Child it is our own inner Parent who is involved in dealing with the inner Child. So this Child is dependent upon this other aspect of ourselves for its nurturing and disciplining. Similarly to family relationships in the outer world, this Child is also a teacher to the inner Parent and inner Adult.

The potential strengths of your Inner Parent are the same strengths that the ideal outer parent would have. Your Inner Parent can be an excellent teacher, providing guidance and setting examples for your Inner Child. Your Inner Parent can maintain an intimate sense of caring and support for your Inner Child so that it develops its own talents and skills. When you express positive concern for your Inner Child or give it encouragement, you are voicing the positive Inner Parent.

During times of stress the positive Inner Parent is a calming, soothing voice that is always present to help and support your Inner Child. The Inner Parent makes decisions, chooses options and evaluates priorities for both Inner Selves. The positive Inner Parent can provide the Inner Child with whatever it wants or needs by practicing the SELF-PARENTING Program. Training and experience allow the positive Inner Parent to become highly developed in rational thinking and intellectual activity. (p. 17)

Without a model for positive outer parenting, learning to become a positive Inner Parent is very difficult. The half-hour format for Self-Parenting sessions is easy to follow. (p. 37)

Pollard explains ways to develop a nurturing Parent and provides excellent exercises for doing this. One of the most important is: "Always remember that whenever you ask a question, your only response will be, "Thank you, Inner Child, for telling me that." (p. 45)

This book will be a help to caregivers and careseekers who are sensitive to the inner voices that often cause problems in our lives but at the same time can be some of our best teachers and guides through the jungles of life.

5-0 out of 5 stars Finally, I get it.
This book gives very simple, direct and "doable" techniques for getting to know oneself better and building self-esteem.It doesn't depend on belief in any one school of psychotherapy or "buy in" into any one methodology of treatment.It doesn't make the assumption that identification of specific parental failures are necessary for healing, or analyzing one's past failures will yield success.I bought "The Self Parenting Program" by John Pollard as well and the Parent Effectiveness Training (PET) manual as well.

5-0 out of 5 stars The best book of self growth ever written - It's incredible.
After fifteen years of research and practice of many body, mind and spiritual techniques I have to say that the only technique that has ever really worked for me to give me what it promises and more is Self-Parenting. If only anybody could give themselves the opportunity to try it the whole world would change for them.
When I first started daily Self Parenting sessions I felt (as the Inner Parent) that it was like a duty for me, something that I "had to" do for my Inner Child. Now, after one year I feel the joy of doing this "as the Inner Parent" and enjoy the sessions more than anything else in my life. It's incredible!

5-0 out of 5 stars Change your life from the INSIDE out.
I have been through therapy and 12-Step work, but the eight months I have beenpracticing Self-Parenting (S/P) has been more beneficial to me than YEARS of therapy.Using S/P with something else I learned after therapy and 12-Step, The Sedona Method, has finally given me the inner peace I have sought for years.

I have been doing a 30-minute S/P session daily since February 2008 and definitely plan to keep doing it - it is now a habit.That 30 minutes in the morning really puts me in touch with MYSELF.

Also, it seems to me that all of my outer relationships have gotten better (without any conscious effort on my part) JUST BECAUSE I HAVE BEEN USING S/P.I am much calmer.I am more present (in the moment).I have more empathy for others.I am less triggered, but when something triggers me I EASILY figure out what the problem is.

One other benefit to using The Self Parenting Program is that I have finally learned how to identify my own needs and how to meet them.Taking responsibility for figuring out my own needs and meeting them has given me so much `ENERGY!'

My `outer' life hasn't changed much since I started using S/P (same home, same relationships, same job) but my `inner' life is so different.For the first time in my life I am truly happy.

In Self-Parenting, Dr. John Pollard III presents the reader with a simple method to learn more about themselves.As they learn more about themselves, they will find themselves and their lives transformed from the inside out. ... Read more


55. Effective Parenting in a Defective World (Focus on the Family)
by Chip Ingram
Paperback: 208 Pages (2007-09-13)
list price: US$13.99 -- used & new: US$8.92
(price subject to change: see help)
Asin: 141430384X
Average Customer Review: 4.5 out of 5 stars
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Editorial Review

Product Description
A parent's greatest desire is to raise a child who can face anything with wisdom and confidence. But in a world of over-extended schedules, amoral messages, and incessant peer-pressure, how can you raise a confident child that follows God's will, not the world's? Chip Ingram's practical tips for modeling right living, building strong bonds, and disciplining effectively will help parents bringing up Christ-centered kids who feel secure and significant no matter what comes their way. The book features practical, age-appropriate parenting tips, charts/diagrams, and action steps. ... Read more

Customer Reviews (7)

4-0 out of 5 stars Sound Parenting and Practically Written
Just finished this book and appreciated the authors eye to eye instructional perspective on parenting.The book offers hope, encouragement, and numerous Biblically based parenting strategies to use throughout your child's life; from toddler through teen years.This book did not, however, touch much on dealing with real tough kids, or give much of the 'tough love' perspective that some kids need.

If the folks are right that say we as parents have about the first 12-13 years of a child's life to instruct, mold, and teach before they start making their own decisions, etc based on what we've taught them, I would not recommend this book to parents of kids over the age of 9-10.Reason being, if you haven't started earlier with the strategies and philosophies in this book, you're too late and you'll only be frustrated reading the book that you hadn't started implementing them earlier.

Great read though, will recommend to friends.

4-0 out of 5 stars World View
Wheather you like this book or not, depends on you world view. If you believe that there is a God, and that he sent his only begotten son to pay for our sins, and that he rose from the dead, then I you will be openminded about this book. The book aims to give a biblical view on how one should treat children.
If, on the other hand you don`t believe there is a God, then I do not think this book will help you in your aim to raise children.

5-0 out of 5 stars Ingram offers guidance through the turbulent waters of parenting
Chip Ingram --- prolific author, pastor and father of four grown children --- tells befuddled parents that it's possible to raise exceptional children in a world gone wild. He opens his text by backtracking some years ago when the television sitcom "Roseanne" was all the rage. Ingram explains that while the American public laughed at this family's obvious dysfunction, somehow they also resonated with their struggles as well. As Ingram notes, "Here was a family in crisis who could laugh about it."

Ingram then poignantly points out that what is laughable at a distance is frequently devastating up close. Perhaps most disconcerting is that the majority of parents seems to live in crisis mode, only reacting to one problem after another rather than proactively planning and leading their children to and through God's life-giving principles. Ingram shares that moms and dads first need to develop clear-cut objectives whereby they are aiming for God's best and highest purpose to be fulfilled in each child's life. Holiness, not happiness, is God's goal. However, parents often get sidetracked by the world's definition of life success that is in large part exactly the opposite of what God's written word commands. Another "must" for parents is to practice what they preach. As the old adage goes, "Character is always more caught than taught. Always."

The author spends a good amount of space describing, through personal retelling of his family's events and that of others, how to learn God's plan for effective discipline, punishment versus discipline, and words that discipline. Each chapter also includes practical steps for moms and dads to incorporate into their daily routine that will strengthen the bonds between parents and children.

Readers will find especially helpful Ingram's section on "Five Smooth Stones," in which he dismantles five life myths and offers the biblical alternative to each. Included are these valuable life lessons:

* First Stone: Teach them to suffer well by instructing children that suffering is a normal component of this life.

* Second Stone: Teach them to work "unto the Lord" by explaining how every person is created to work.

* Third Stone: Teach them to manage their wealth wisely by underscoring that everything is a sacred stewardship and ultimately owned by God.

* Fourth Stone: Teach them to make wise decisions by reaping God's best through the habit of daily holy living.

* Fifth Stone: Teach them to live grace-filled lives by embracing the principle that everyone is created to receive and give grace.

Ingram's text is full of instruction, but as is his custom, his voice of encouragement consistently takes readers by the hand and walks them to a more hope-filled place. As he notes, "Even God's parenting is messy," so we humans should take heart and not give up.

--- Reviewed by Michele Howe

5-0 out of 5 stars MUST HAVE for parents!!!!
I have read 100's of parenting books over the years. Wish I had had this one years ago! This is the book I am recommending to all my friends and buying as gifts for everyone I know with kids. This book is detailed, but not too much information. It is real, honest and "user-friendly". I love Dobson and have valued his 'Bringing up Boys', but this book is another MUST READ for every parent!

5-0 out of 5 stars Love it!
This book is going to be the first book I use in our Christian Mommies book club I am starting in my neighborhood, I love it and can't wait to share it!It also has a free Book Discussion Guide you can obtain online. ... Read more


56. The Secret of Parenting: How to Be in Charge of Today's Kids--from Toddlers to Preteens--Without Threats or Punishment
by Anthony E. Wolf Ph.D.
Paperback: 256 Pages (2000-09-01)
list price: US$14.00 -- used & new: US$6.42
(price subject to change: see help)
Asin: 0374527083
Average Customer Review: 4.5 out of 5 stars
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Editorial Review

Product Description
Essential advice from the author of the bestselling Get Out Of My Life

Today's children--from toddlers to preteens--challenge their parents in ways that would have been unthinkable a generation ago, notes Anthony E. Wolf, and parents are often uncertain about how to cope.

In his new book, Wolf presents a fresh perspective on this less pleasant behavior and a surprisingly simple method for dealing with it. He argues that punishments and rewards don't work and may even be counterproductive. Instead, parents must act swiftly and decisively following Wolf's easy but powerful technique. Using numerous examples of effective and ineffective parent-child interactions, he offers practical advice on a wide range of basic issues, from tantrums and back talk, to getting kids off to school in the morning and eliminating sibling fights.

Humorous and easy to use, The Secret of Parenting is guaranteed to dramatically increase the joy parents get from raising their children.
... Read more

Customer Reviews (13)

5-0 out of 5 stars Why didn't we find this book sooner?!
As parents of a 9 and 7 year old who can be quite challenging, we have read MANY parenting books. The Strong Willed Child, Nurture by Nature, 123 Magic, the list goes on. None of them were very helpful.I halfheartedly started reading this book and was blown away by the first couple chapters. The description of the "baby self" explained SO much and made me feel like maybe I wasn't failing as a parent after all. It just makes so much sense. We've only been using the method for about a week but so far it's like magic. My kids, who are incredibly stubborn and persistant, really do stop their behavior when we don't "feed" the baby self, and they are much more content. My daughter was actually running around the house yelling "I'm happy! I'm happy!" yesterday.I am thrilled to have found the book, but sad that I didn't find it a few years ago. My house is so much more peaceful now and I have high hopes that it will stay that way.

4-0 out of 5 stars good information and technique
Still reading but so far so good. Reading many authors after this one. We do endorse as a good purchase. Good luck.

5-0 out of 5 stars One of the best parenting books
I wish I had found this book when my son was a toddler. It made a lot of difference in my approach to parenting and gave me understanding on what was going on with my son. It takes a lot of work and effort to stop old parenting styles, including punishments, threats and manipulating with rewards; at the end it really pays off. It has been 5 years since I found this book and we follow its advice, it made a lot of difference, my son used to go to his room slam the door and shut down; he would be upset and crying. He has not done that since we started a different parenting approach, including dialog and setting up expectations. My son is 12 now and he is a great kid. I am thankful for the author who has shared his wisdom about parenting. I also recommend:"Raising Cooperative & Self-Confident Children" by Ph.D. Francine C. Beauvoir
and "Parent Effectiveness Training, P.E.T." By Dr. Thomas Gordon.

5-0 out of 5 stars Potentially life changing!
This is one of the few parenting books I have felt compelled to read cover to cover. First, Wolf's advice is very practically oriented, and the first time I tried his suggestion to "disengage" I experienced the effectiveness of the approach. Just as important, he outlines the "big picture" of what this sort of parenting aims to achieve: happy, self-confident children who do the right thing by developing a real moral compass, not just behaving out of fear of punishment.Best of all, as other reviewers have suggested, he helps put the joy back in parenting by placing your own child's behavior in its proper perspective, and by emphasizing the positive power all parents have over their children.I can already see the improvement in my son's behavior, and in my mood!

5-0 out of 5 stars Finally, I Get It!
This book was wonderful for me.It helped me understand why my children's behavior is so different around me, than it is around everyone else.It's very easy to read and humorous, but also gives sound practical advice. ... Read more


57. Christlike Parenting: Taking the Pain Out of Parenting
by Glenn I. Latham
Paperback: 211 Pages (1999-06)
list price: US$15.95 -- used & new: US$10.29
(price subject to change: see help)
Asin: 1882723465
Average Customer Review: 4.5 out of 5 stars
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Customer Reviews (20)

5-0 out of 5 stars Wonderful Author, Wonderful Book.
Dr. Latham teaches parents how to help all children feel loved and to create a wonderful relationship between parent and child, helping the child not just do what is right but WANT to do what is right.

4-0 out of 5 stars Information Was GREAT.But the book fell apart.
I have read some of Glenn Latham's books before and his methods are very effective.I haven't finished this book quite yet (7 kids and not a lot of free time), however I really love the Christ-like approach.I'm learning more patience, and how to help my children grow to be the people they should instead of yelling at them for doing something they shouldn't, and that feels good.I would highly recommend this book to anyone who wants to be a better parent and raise smarter, and sweeter children!Just make sure to get the paperback, and get it spiral-bound so you can read and re-read it without the binding breaking on you like mine did!

5-0 out of 5 stars Fantastic, thought-provoking guide for parents
This book opened my eyes to a whole new way of parenting. The book seamlessly combines Dr. Latham's findings as a college professor of family studies with principles taught by Jesus Christ. Although I read the scriptures regularly, Dr. Latham's book showed my how I can apply Christ's teachings to my every day challenges as a parent. The book offered things I was able to apply immediately and things I can work on over time. Extremely helpful, thought-provoking and life-changing.

5-0 out of 5 stars Excellent
I'm so glad I bought this book and not Latham's text books.It's the perfect length.I'm sure I may not be able to work on it all at once and I may not even do some of the things mentioned in the book.But it has and will be worth the money spent.I just wish there was an even smaller version for my husband to read!!

5-0 out of 5 stars What a help!
I appreciate this book immensely because of the practical approach that Dr Latham uses. He discusses principles of character as lived and taught by Jesus as found in the Holy Bible. He includes real life scenarios and situations that illustrate typical responses to problem behaviors but more importantly the Christlike actions parents can take toward problem behaviors. He quotes scripture to increase understanding of the significance of applying the principles and associated benefits therefrom. It will be a resource for me to refer back to again and again. ... Read more


58. Devotions for Sacred Parenting: A Year of Weekly Devotions for Parents
by Gary Thomas
Hardcover: 160 Pages (2005-03-22)
list price: US$14.99 -- used & new: US$8.15
(price subject to change: see help)
Asin: 0310255961
Average Customer Review: 5.0 out of 5 stars
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Product Description
This companion devotional book to Gary Thomas’s Sacred Parenting works off this simple premise: Raising children shapes the parent every bit as much as parents shape their children. Fifty-two devotionals. ... Read more

Customer Reviews (3)

5-0 out of 5 stars Best I've Read
As a pastor, I have read plenty of devotional books. This one, however, stands head and shoulders above the rest. Maybe it is the stage we are in, but this is just a phenomenal book. I have given out about eight of them. I highly recommend it for any couple raising children.

5-0 out of 5 stars Help for Busy Parents
Gary Thomas offers busy parents a year plan for renewal for your family. Understanding the heart of the home to be God's holy work unfolding within the heart of parents who need to be guided and cared for by our loving God, Thomas presents practical devotions for parents who may think they do not have enough time to pray or enjoy time with God. Down to earth yet deeply rooted in the great historical soil of classic Christianity, Thomas leads us deeper into what it means to raise children as a spiritual calling.

For another recently published book on spiritual parenting, look into The Busy Family's Guide to Spirituality: Practical Lessons for Modern Living From the Monastic Tradition

5-0 out of 5 stars Just Amazing. . .
The author truly lets you see parenting as it really is, with all the nuts and bolts on display.He doesn't mince words or pretty things up.Rather, as in his marriage books, he gives the message that it's hard but rewarding (kind of an Outward BOund of spirituality, if you will).His marriage book may have literally saved my marriage and since then I've recommended and purchased it for lots of friends -- his parenting books are very similar.They challenge you and force you to grow, as you are forced to acknowledge that we don't ultimately order our kids from catalogs so that they'll be pleasing to us, and that in some strange way, they are pleasing to GOd BECAUSE they challenge us, not DESPITE the fact that they do.I know that I have grown greatly from being a parent, and will continue to do so.It's nice to have this book as a companion on the journey.
... Read more


59. Nighttime Parenting: How to Get Your Baby and Child to Sleep
by William Sears
Paperback: 224 Pages (1999-11-01)
list price: US$15.00 -- used & new: US$3.78
(price subject to change: see help)
Asin: 0452281482
Average Customer Review: 3.5 out of 5 stars
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Product Description
Why do some families have fewer sleep problems than others? What works for most parents most of the time and why?

Parenting is a full-time, twenty-four-hour-a-day job. Nighttime Parenting was written to make that job easier and to help the whole family--mother, father, baby--sleep better. It helps parents understand why babies sleep differently than adults, offers solutions to nighttime problems, and even describes how certain styles of nighttime parenting can aid in child spacing and lower the risks of Sudden Infant Death Syndrome (SIDS).

Renowned pediatrician Dr. William Sears helps you find a solution to your baby's sleepless nights and offers comprehensive, caring advice on issues such as:

* Where babies should sleep
* What foods help children sleep
* Tips for single parents
* Getting children to bed without a struggle

This newly-revised edition incorporates the latest research on SIDS and its prevention, and is truly a must-have volume for all parents.

"This book belongs on the shelf right next to The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding. It will help all new parents raise happier and more secure children."--Mary White, founding mother, La Leche League (r) International ... Read more

Customer Reviews (70)

5-0 out of 5 stars marvellous
i think the world would change if more read this book. if you love your baby and read this... you will surely learn to let your love flow naturally and that everyone feels easyier, more fulfilled more loving, with this attempt.that you could be loving and a good person at nighttimes too.

4-0 out of 5 stars Good, but redundant
Good information, but much of the same info is provided verbatim in the Sears' Baby Book.

5-0 out of 5 stars Answered lots of questions!
This book answered a lot of questions for me and why our "high needs" baby would not go to sleep.It has helped me understand our baby a lot better.Dr. Sears explains why it is so difficult for a mother to let her baby "cry it out" and helped my husband to understand the physical and emotional reactions that I have when our baby cries.

1-0 out of 5 stars Whose in control? Parent or baby?
The main issue is the overlying philosophy of the author and his family that the baby basically decides what works best.We think mom and dad should decide whats best for our family not the baby.

Most of the advice in this book comes down to allowing your baby to sleep with you or not.In this book the author tries to convince you it's ok for the baby to sleep with you all the time until they are around 3-4, then separate them into their own room.Good luck!Good luck separating the baby after you have allowed it to get used to being with you every night for the past 3 years.Also, good luck having any intimate time with your spouse for the next 3 years!

We think the philosophy is misguided both in common sense and scripturally.Our philosophy and the way we have always been taught through many instances in the Bible is mom and dad's relationship comes first, children are second. This is not the philosophy I came to understand in this book.

In summary, from reading this book and others by this author and his wife, letting the baby sleep with the parents was the wifes idea and the husband had to play along, so they adopted this as the best philosophy.We don't agree.

We feel the separation between child and parent needs to happen early for many reasons.However, this is not the philosophy of this book or it's author.

3-0 out of 5 stars Not helpful unless you are breastfeeding
This book is helpful for breastfeeding moms, but if you want to do attachment parenting and for whatever reason are not breastfeeding, this book will probably be a big disappointment. The two main suggestions are that you nurse your baby to soothe him/her and you let him/her sleep in your bed.So if you are formula feeding, you probably will find this book not full of solutions for you.

Dr. Sears, please note that not every mother is a birth mother and not every mother has a baby that is able to breastfeed and not every mother breastfeeds, but those mothers still love their babies and want them to have peaceful sleep. ... Read more


60. Raising An Emotionally Intelligent Child The Heart of Parenting
by Ph.D. John Gottman, Joan Declaire
Paperback: 240 Pages (1998-08-12)
list price: US$15.00 -- used & new: US$7.11
(price subject to change: see help)
Asin: 0684838656
Average Customer Review: 5.0 out of 5 stars
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Intelligence That Comes from the Heart

Every parent knows the importance of equipping children with the intellectual skills they need to succeed in school and life. But children also need to master their emotions. Raising an Emotionally Intelligent Child is a guide to teaching children to understand and regulate their emotional world. And as acclaimed psychologist and researcher John Gottman shows, once they master this important life skill, emotionally intelligent children will enjoy increased self-confidence, greater physical health, better performance in school, and healthier social relationships. Raising an Emotionally Intelligent Child will equip parents with a five-step "emotion coaching" process that teaches how to:

* Be aware of a child's emotions
* Recognize emotional expression as an opportunity for intimacyand teaching
* Listen empathetically and validate a child's feelings
* Label emotions in words a child can understand
* Help a child come up with an appropriate way to solve a problem or deal with an upsetting issue or situation

Written for parents of children of all ages, Raising an Emotionally Intelligent Child will enrich the bonds between parent and child and contribute immeasurably to the development of a generation of emotionally healthy adults.Amazon.com Review
In Raising an Emotionally Intelligent Child, psychology professorJohn Gottman explores the emotional relationship between parents andchildren. It's not enough to simply reject an authoritarian model ofparenting, Gottman says. A parent needs to be concerned with the quality ofemotional interactions. Gottman, author of Why Marriages Succeed orFail, and coauthor Joan Declaire focus first onthe parent (a "know thyself" approach), and provide a series of exercisesto assess parenting styles and emotional self-awareness. The authorsidentify a five-step "emotion coaching" process to help teach children howto recognize and address their feelings, which includes becoming aware ofthe child's emotions; recognizing that dealing with these emotions is anopportunity for intimacy; listening empathetically; helping the child labelemotions; setting limits; and problem-solving. Chapters on divorce,fathering, and age-based differences in emotional development help makeGottman's teachings detailed and useful. --Ericka Lutz ... Read more

Customer Reviews (42)

5-0 out of 5 stars Great parenting book
I read this book years ago and it helped me to be a better mother. Now, whenever someone special to me is having a baby, I purchase a copy of this book for them.

5-0 out of 5 stars Start using this book now!
I loved this book. As a youth/family and marriage counselor I have a great deal of respect for John Gottmans' research methods and teachings. His call for "emotion coaching" is right on. Follow these five steps authentically and lovingly and you will be amazed at the relational growth with your children.

These tools are solid and easy to follow.

5-0 out of 5 stars Raising An Emotionally Intelligent Child
Awesome book!! Everyone should read this one. Parent or not, it is an amazing look into how to relate to, guide, and love children well. It is also a great book for helping adults look into their own heart and see their own intelligence level. Looking at the different styles of emotional parenting helps bring light to how parents can either help or hinder their child's emotional stability.
Don't pass this one by!!

5-0 out of 5 stars Children's Emotional Intelligence revealed!
Gottman is a renound researcher and author and has once again provided fascinating and up to date research on the life of a child and the importance of parent style and interactions with their children. Teaching children to name their emotions and learn from them provides a foundation for healthy relationships and the ability to regulate emotion. A must read!!

5-0 out of 5 stars If you love your child, you must apply these principles
Gottman bases his conclusions and principles of raising an emotionally intelligent child on sound long term research. But he also manages to write in a style that is easy and nice to read. The decision of buying or not buying this book might seem quite unimportant now but the outcomes of your choice may be great. Such outcomes will likely range between raising an immature individual who may blame you when he is adult for your inadequate effort developing him and raising a mature, self-responsible mentally and emotionally healthy individual who can be a responsible leader for himself and for others around him. A must-own book if you walk your talk when you say that you truly love your child and want all the best for him. ... Read more


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